What if I don’t make enough money? What if I fail? What if I make the wrong decision? These were all questions that my “what if” scenarios could no longer answer, and I could no longer ignore.
As I took an axe to those roots, the “what ifs” were ultimately unmasked for what they were: lack of trust in God. I was both sad and mad at myself. I was also relieved because I finally acknowledged my fears. I asked for forgiveness and for God to help me in the rooting process. I no longer wanted to be afraid of the “what ifs”; instead, I wanted to move forward even if I didn’t know what every step was going to look like. I found Scriptures that both chipped away at unhealthy roots and nourished healthy ones. I realized that living in the realm of “what ifs” was more frightening than actually walking through the reality of what was – and had the potential to be.
As unhealthy roots were pulled up, I asked God to plant and water roots of deep trust in Him. What did that look like? For me, it was intentionally remembering all of the times God had provided – both in the past and in the present, remembering that He is also in my future. It meant revisiting His promises over and over again. He is a God Who keeps His Word and whatever He sets it out to do, it accomplishes it. It was continually reminding myself of His character and who He is. His Word not only describes His character, it is His character. The interesting thing was that as these roots grew stronger, the confusion slowly began to lift, and flashes of clarity began to come into focus. I became more aware of my gifts and talents. I relaxed and trusted that He was leading me.
Pulling up unhealthy roots is not an easy task. It’s painful. It’s humbling. But above everything else, it’s worth the hard work. I’ve learned that rooting down and pulling up in a heart that’s open to God is the path to finding my purpose. Going through this encouraged me to continue the digging and the pulling up, excited for what He is going to reveal and lead me into. And just like my husband and I had to clear out the backyard before we could begin building, it wasn’t until we were staring at a dirt rectangle that we were then able to truly envision a new patio.
Laura Koellhoffer, Contributor
Laura is the creator and founder of Manassah Moments. Visit her blog to find out more and click on the icons to follow her on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.
Blog: Manasseh Moments